He received it in an amazing way.
It used to be that bipolar disorder was my big coming-out. These days, my symptoms are so much better than they used to be that it's become a side note.
That's what I'm aiming for with vulvodynia.
I was at the gym with a friend the other day carefully stepping around the reason why I don't want to ride the stationary bikes and I'd rather not join her for a swim. Ahead of that conversation, I thought I'd be fine telling her, but in the moment I just couldn't say it.
Bipolar's only a side note now because I've got it under what to me is miraculous control (especially without meds). If it were still as bad as it was in the past, it'd still be a guarded fact.
Vulvodynia's been the center of my life for a while, and it won't move to the side until I can reduce my symptoms significantly. Chronic pain is constant trauma. Every moment, something is harming you. Time erodes your resilience. You succumb. You just do.
But I've seen my symptoms get better, and I know if I can spend my days averaging a pain level of 2 or 3 instead of 5 or 6, that alone would destabilize my orbit and recenter my life on something else (me?). Even if I can't get rid of my pain, reducing it will still be meaningful.